Things That Need Understanding
by westpoints
Summary: An unidentified number of dialogues between Izzie and Alex, about all things that need understanding. AlexIzzie implied.
1. Letters of the alphabet

I know, I need to be working on "The Game." But this was a nice distraction.

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Grey's Anatomy.

* * *

"Hey, Izzie?" 

"_What_, Alex?"

"Do you spell your name with a 'y' or an 'i-e'?"

"'i-e,' why?"

"Just wondering, that's all."

"I don't believe you."

"Fine then. Your loss."

"Does it matter if I spell it with a 'y'?"

"...No, I just know that some people spell it with a 'y' and some people spell it with an 'i-e.'"

"So does it matter to you?"

"No, I just wanted to make sure that I got it right in case I ever wanted to send you something."

"I mean, does it matter at all which letters of the alphabet I choose to include in my name?"

"It really doesn't."

"Okay then."

"Okay."

"...Because, you know, I could change it to a 'y.'"

* * *

Izzie looks so much better with an "i-e". Don't you think so? 

Please review.


	2. Bored bored

Ha**ha**, I have rescued this from oneshotdom! Undoubtedly, there's someone out there going "I thought we were freed from this." Well, you're not.

Anyway...Disclaimer, lahdiddydah...Grey's Anatomy in no way bleongs to me, yada yada yada, you had me at hello, you can't handle the truth, agihhh. Or however Tina Fey does that.

* * *

"I'm bored." 

"Mm."

"Alex."

"What?"

"I'm _bored_."

"...okay."

"No, I don't think you get it. I'm _bored_ bored."

"And somehow, by saying the word twice, I'm supposed to magically understand what it is you want me to do about you being _bored _bored."

"Oh, for the love of God!"

"Izzie, where are you going?"

"To find Cristina."

"Because she'll know what to do?"

"About me being _bored_ bored, yes."

"Wait, no, Izzie...oh well. Hey Iz, do you want your fries?"

"Have 'em, you pig."

"I will!"

* * *

I, for one, am guilty of saying a word twice, as though that gives it a new meaning. All girls do. I'm sure adult women do it, too. "Do you just like him, or do you _like_ like him?" "I'm not going _shopping_ shopping, so don't worry." "Yeah, we went out on a _date_ date." 

I swear to god there's a difference.

Hrm. Please review.


	3. Pets and street names

Yay! Another one! I just had extra time, and these things take about 15 minutes.

Disclaimer: Mm...Grey's Anatomy...does...not...belong...to...meeeeeeeeeee...that wasn't so bad.

* * *

"Hey, Izz, did you ever have any pets?"

"Besides my hyena slash dog?"

"When you were a kid."

"I had a cat once."

"What was its name?"

"Gloves."

"Gloves?"

"Well, everybody else I knew named their cat Mittens or Boots. I named mine Gloves."

"Really."

"Yes. And don't ask what street I grew up on."

"Never crossed my mind."

"Good. Why'd you ask, anyway?"

"I just wanted to know."

"Uh huh. Just like the time you asked me how I spelled my name."

"I'm trying to get to know you. You know, like normal friends do?"

"Oh, so we're friends."

"If you like, we can play icebreaker games where you come up with a word that starts with the same letter as your name so we can all remember better. Here, I'll start. My name is Alex, and I—"

"Am an asshole."

"Oh come on now, that's not fair. I didn't even get to finish. And how did you know that was what I was going to say?"

"Because it is true."

"Every word. So, uh, what happened to this cat?"

"It ran away."

"Not surprising."

"What's that supposed to mean."

"Well, if _I_ was a cat and had you for an owner, then—"

"You are hopeless."

"I am."

"And you even admit to it!"

"Very good, Stevens."

"Did you have any pets?"

"Nope. Dad wouldn't spring for one. Wanted a dog, though."

"Typical."

"Well, I _did_ want a Bengal tiger, but...y'know, I figured if dad didn't want a dog..."

"He wouldn't like a feral cat with the ability to tear his throat out?"

"How _do_ you do that?"

* * *

That last line was sarcasm, kids.

And you KNOW you know about the "name of your childhood pet and the street you grew up on" thing. Google it if you don't.

Hrm. please review.


	4. New Year's resolutions

Yes, I've finally got another one up. It's inspired by something that actually was bothering me.

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

"Hey Alex?"

"Mm?"

"Do New Year's Resolutions expire?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean...most people can't keep their resolutions past February. What if you do keep your resolution? When can you stop?"

"Well, I would assume that if you've kept at it this long, you don't need to give it up."

"But what if you caaaaan't?"

"Izzie, what was you resolution?"

"I was just wondering! Is it okay just to wonder?"

"No, it's not. Tell me."

"Just answer the question!"

"They're probably null after the next New Year's."

"Oh, thank God. One more week."

"One more week...?"

"Oh shut up."

"It's something dirty, isn't it?"

"Why are you so male?"

"It is, isn't it?"

"No, it's not! I was just asking a simple question, because it's always bothered me."

"What, that you can't have sex?"

"I did not say that."

"Good, because you've broken your resolution quite a few times, then."

"It's not my resolution!"

"Could have fooled me."

"I hate you."

"Mm. You're a resolution whore. That's what you are."

"Oh yeah? How long did you keep your resolution?"

"I didn't make one."

* * *

I would make a resolution to write more of these, because they're pretty fun to write, but I never keep mine past the first week. So.

Review.


	5. Crest and Aquafresh

Right, so after 100 drabbles focused on Addison, I'm finally updating my other fics, my third love, Alex/Izzie fics. So. "The Game" is finished, and here is another thing that needs understanding!

* * *

"How do you get your toothpaste?"

"I go to the store...and grab a tube...usually Aquafresh...I go home...open the box—"

"Stop being an asshole, Alex. I meant, do you squeeze from the bottom or squeeze from the middle?"

"The bottom. It's easier to deal with. Why?"

"Ugh. Meredith squeezes from the middle."

"Oh. Sounds desolate."

"Alex!"

"Just go buy your own tube of toothpaste, then!"

"That's not the point, Alex. The point is that she squeezes from the middle, and even if I do get my own toothpaste, she will still squeeze from the middle of _her_ toothpaste."

"...uh...huh."

"Buying my own toothpaste will not keep me from seeing Meredith's mutated tube every morning next to the sink."

"...So you're mad because Meredith is destroying the teeth-cleaning feng shui of her own bathroom."

"It's just...you know how people divide the world in two halves, you know, like glass half full or glass half empty, or chocolate or vanilla, or I don't know, leather or lace."

"And you divide them into toothpaste squeezed from the middle or the bottom."

"Yes. And you know how like, each half kinda has their own characteristics, their own little quirks right, like the glass half fulls are sunny and bright, and the chocolates are daring, and the leathers are all exotic. The middle squeezers are...not like us. They're unorganized, they're emotional messes, they can't plan ahead."

"Yeah, Iz, I'm a half empty guy, I'm a daring vanilla, and I like to say I'm an exotic lace. Your little half-world thing isn't working out."

"It's just...I don't know if I can stay in a house with someone who squeezes their toothpaste from the middle of the tube, you know?"

"You've lived with her for almost a year, and _now_ you notice Meredith's emotional issues? Seriously?"

"I just don't like seeing Crest being squeezed from the middle!"

"...you use Crest?"

"Healthy beautiful smiles for life."

* * *

Mmhmm. My best friend squeezes her toothpaste from the middle, and it drives me UP THE WALL.


End file.
